I walked into this bar
by Countwhip
Summary: A guy at work talks about Ziva and Tony gets jealous. He decides to act like he's her boyfriend. Rated T for language. This is my first fic ever. Suckish summary but good story inside. :


AN: This is my first fanfiction ever so please don't be mean. :) Also, sorry if i made any grammer mistake.

' I walked into this bar, and there I saw the most beautiful woman on earth. She was all exotic and stuff and she had a nice ass. I looked around, and every guy in the room was staring at her. But she wasn't paying any attention to them. She was talking to the bartender, who had red cheeks and was fuzz ling with his hands. I guess he was not as ugly as the other guys in the room. Either way, I walked up to the bar and sat down. She was even more beautiful from close.

'So, what would you advice me?', the woman said smiling.

At that moment the heaven opened.

'The um…the err…the…eh..t….'

'I guess I have to decide for myself then, yes?', she said.

She had a sexy and at the same moment funny accent.

'Err…um…I….eh…'

I felt kinda bad for the man because he was too nervous to say anything proper.

'A glass water please.'

At that moment the guy completely lost it, became red and started to bite on his fingers.

'Eh…Is there something wrong?', the woman said giving him a apologetic smile.

'N-No…I'll g-get it for y-you.', he replied finally able to talk again.

Then he took of and started searching for a glass that was good enough.

Now, with the bartender finally out of sight, I decided to give it a go. You never know, right?

'Hey', I said as normal as I could, 'You come here much?

Alright, it sucked. But what was I supposed to say?

'Actually no, you?'

'Yeah, but the women here are normally not as beautiful as you.', I said grinning.

At that point she just chuckled.

'Well, maybe we could go drink something sometime.', I hopefully said.

'Or maybe not.', she said chuckling again.

I didn't know what to think, did she like me or not? But I guess I'll never know since the bartender came back with a glass of water.

'Dude, you didn't get her number? John, what's wrong with you man?'

'Hey! It's not like she would've given it to me!'

I can't help but chuckle. These guys are really idiots. Though I'm curious who that woman was. I mean, most beautiful woman on earth? My ass! The only woman suiting that title is Ziva-err somebody I know. Why can't I get her out of my head? Wait a moment! Exotic? Sexy accent? Ending a sentence with yes? Nice ass? Err…forget about that last thing. That guy is talking about Ziva! What the…She's mine! Well, not really..but I'm the only person who is permitted to flirt with her!

'Look! That's her!', the John guy suddenly yells.

I turn my head so quickly I feel a little dizzy. But the only woman I see is a agent Lee who just came out of the elevator. Phieuw! I don't mind people flirting with her.

'Err…is that her?', the guy next to John asks disappointed.

'What? No, not her. Behind her!'

At that exact moment Ziva steps out of the elevator. Shit!

'Now that is what I'm talking about.', John says grinning.

'Hot damn.', is the only thing the other guy manages to say.

SHIT!SHIT!SHIT! What am I supposed to do know? A part of me wants to hit John and his friend, a other part of me wants to run up to Ziva and act like I'm her boyfriend. Choice two sounds definitely more appealing.

I quickly run up to Ziva, put my arm around her and give her my most charming smile.

'Hello there sweetcheeks, how you doin'?'

'What you do got Tony?', Ziva says giving me a supposed to look annoyed look. I can see she actually doesn't mind at all.

'Nothing, I just wanted to greet my favorite ninja chick.'

With ninja chick I of course mean woman on earth.

'Then I suppose you could greet me this way everyday?', she says grinning.

'Of course, if you want me to.'

She gives me a playful smile and walks up to her desk. If only she knew how I really want to greet her.

Then realize why I actually did this. I look over at John and see him staring at me with a glare that could kill. I give him a evil smile in return and walk over to Ziva's desk. She's doing something on her computer so I go stand behind her.

'Watcha doin' Zee-vah?'

She turns around and gives me a annoyed glare.

'Work. And you are doing nothing, as usual.', but she can't help but smile.

'Actually, I am doing something.', I say flashing her a smile.

'And what is that?'

There's that playful smile again.

'I'm amusing you with my amazing presence.'

'Who says I want you company?

'Your cheeks do, Zee-vah.'

'Tony, I'm sick of this.', she suddenly says standing up.

'W…-'

But before I can say anything she grabs me by my jacket and pulls me towards the elevator. The last thing I see is John looking extremely pissed.

Ziva walks out of the elevator with a very satisfied smile on her face. I follow her with probably the biggest smile ever smiled.

'And Tony, how was it?', Abby who now is standing in the office asks.

'Let's just say it was pretty damn hot in there.'

AN: I hope you liked it! If you do, please review!

Bye! :)


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